Getting ready to go

Why is it that I tell my husband that I'm going to bed, yet sit down and get on the computer?

I have to be up in 6 hours to get ready and finish packing.

I am leaving for a 3 day weekend, GNO if you will, to Disneyland...NO KIDS.

This will be the first time that I have been away from them for this long.
I am excited, yet a little sad. I was reading them stories tonight and just kept thinking

"what if I don't come back...this will be the last book I read to them"

I know, I am mental, and I need therapy, but I do think about those things...

I think we all do, but maybe just don't admit it?

I told Brooklyn that I was going with Grandma and Alli and Ash

and she cried and exclaimed "I want to go too!"

I told her she couldn't, but used the good stand-by...if you are good, I'll bring you a surprise!

That perked her right up.

I kinda wish she was coming.

But then I couldn't leave Gus too...

Then Brian would have to come as well...

then it wouldn't be much of a GNO, would it?

Why do we as mom's feel guilty leaving our kids?

They will be fine, they are in good hands, everybody tells me not to feel guilty,

that i'll be a better mom when I get back.

I FEEL GUILTY.

Oh well, nothing much I can do now.

And, with the puking that was going on tonight from crying too hard...

the guilt level has come down a bit.

I went with my sister-in-laws to do pictures with all the cousins in hallowee costumes,

and to try again with Gavin, Lauren and Levi.

The kids were so dang cute!

Here are my little stinkers in their halloween costumes.

And this is the cutest little munchkin I have EVER seen!

Not that she's a muchkin for halloween, just in real life.

For halloween, she is Ariel.

And also a little sneak peak for my sister-in-law Gretchen. I couldn't decide which one I liked better, looking or not, so I put them both on.

Brooklyn asked me tonight if Jesus was big or little.

I said big.

She asked where he lived.

I said heaven.

She asked where heaven was.

I told her I didn't know.

She asked if it was in Iowa.

I told her "maybe"

Now, I am really off to bed.

As soon as I decide which movie to get from itunes and get it downloaded...

really, why do I wait for the last minute?

UGH!